Must write this for all my friends/family who have had mammograms or known someone who has! I found this in a book I am reading by Barbara Johnson a humorist
This is an xray that has its own name because because no one wants to actually say the word "breast". Mammograms require your breasts to do gymnastics. If you have extremely agile breasts, you should be fine. Most breasts, however, pretty much hang around doing nothing in particular, so they are woefully unprepared. But youcan prepare for a mammogram right at home using these simple exercises.
Exercise 1. Refrigerate two bookends overnight. Lay one of your breasts (either will do) between the bookends and Smash the bookends together as hard as you can. Repeat this three times daily.
Exercise 2. Locate a pasta maker or old wringer washer. Feed the breast into the machineand start cranking. Repeat twice daily.
Exercise 3. (advanced only please): Situate yourself comfortably on you side on the garage floor. Place one of your breasts snugly behind the rear tire of the family van. When you give the signal, have your hubby slowly ease the car into reverse. Hold for five seconds. Repeat on other side.